My New Earth work is actually on twiiter.com/BookClubClass It's a text messaging book club. In case you came here from the Oprah website and were wondering where it all is. I'll bring my New Earth Work over here because, I guess this is where it's meant to be. Welcome to Jippyjabber! PS I am auntjippy on the Oprah message boards.
Friday, March 30, 2007
Sometimes I am like a lifegaurd and I sit and I sit and the kid feels calm and he falls asleep but if I move or think about moving or breathe deeply as if I am sleeping he jolts up in a panic.
Zach s calm now. Who wouldn't be calm holding your mother hostage and making her stand gaurd duty against god knows what evil paranoia that lurks in your head. There is no warning when life gaurd or I guess, sleep gaurd duty calls.
To help put him to sleep. I pretended to be robot mommy and tickle him. He used to get violent when I tried to play with him, YOU ARE NOT ROBOT MOMMY, YOU ARE MY MOTHER! He did say that today just through the laughter. Over the years I have learned how to quit just before it's too much for him. I hear his laughter so rarely.
Then I noticed his arms moving weird and I thought something was wrong. Dear god what happened? He's rigid and wow they were moving like a robot! and quietly like a mouse I heard. I am robot zachary.... Oh how I wanted to make a big deal out of this! This is a beautiful moment when you just want to let the tears burts out becasue the heavans parted and the love is shining down on you. Your kid just played with you in this way for the first time and he's thirteen years old.
( So excuse me if I let the tears out now. ( My beautiful robot how I'd love to play with you some more. )
I said, Oh you tickle mommy, let me see how to shut off Robot Zachary and I reached back behind his neck and pretended to turn off Robot zachary. You are not robot zachary, you are just my Zachary. He snuggled in close to me and I held him like he was five. Because his mind is five.
When Zachary does something new you have to keep a limit on it. Its as if he really formed a new neuro pathway for this and it should be treated like a raw exposed nerve. If I want him to be able to play the loud ROBOT ZACHARY I have to keep the new quiet robot zachary protected and gently let this pathway build up strength.
This is the best thing I have ever figured out about how his brain works.