My New Earth work is actually on It's a text messaging book club. In case you came here from the Oprah website and were wondering where it all is. I'll bring my New Earth Work over here because, I guess this is where it's meant to be. Welcome to Jippyjabber! PS I am auntjippy on the Oprah message boards.

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

I am glad I fell apart and put everything back together in a little better order than it was before.
One thing I have learned is to support my own process.

I was ready for today and it was a tuff one. I was so glad I had things ready and waiting for me during this hard time for Zach.
At one point his breathing seemed to be short and hard. I got him to relax and it stopped and came back one more time.
I am waiting to find out if this is related to new medication........

I have to look up what a normal pulse rate for his age is..... I am glad he gets the EKG next week.


cinemagypsy said...

My daughter was having such bad cramps today she was in tears. I wanted to take her pain, it broke my heart. I thought of Zach and how hard it must be for you to see this every day. I bet it is something you can never get used to.
Has he always had pain since he was born? Is he in pain every day?

Jennifer said...

Oh I feel for your daughter too... I remember you made a comment once about how they tried to tell you cramps weren't real. ( would link to it if I thought I could find that) At least now we can kind of offer some tricks ....advil, heating pad, Nothing really takes it away though.

Zach was born in pain. He screamed for the first few years of his life. Now he takes pain medication every day so he can have pain free days. He sometimes breaks through the pain medicine and yeah I feel worthless. Like I'd sell my soul for his comfort. LOl
It's my greatest spiritual trial to learn to be compassionate and yet whole in times of his greatest suffering. uhhh I pray like a freaking
On the other hand, his happiness actually just his smile can make me high.

cinemagypsy said...


Jennifer said...

Heartbreaking/pathetic in a way too.....

if I don't turn it into something good. It was a long journey to find out that he was suffering pain and that he could be helped.

I am piecing together a PSA to help other families know that some kids can be helped by seeing a pain team. It saved us.

Some people still believe kids like zach don't feel pain. Some don't not in the way we think of experiencing pain. It's not an easy issue.

Our worst days are behind us because when he was treated for pain he grew, he does things now that he was never expected to be able to do.

He is amazing with his love of life and learning. He's here for a reason and he's motivated.

I am proud of him. I know he's not done. I have a lot to look forward to with this guy.

Is it crazy for me to believe that we'll go as high as we were low?

There is an energy to it and it makes me feel like the arrow in the bow and the tension is pulled back to the extreme and then we'll be free......... I just hope we are aimed at something good! LOL

Jennifer said...

Cinemagypsy.......Thanks for the inspiration! There you go......I did something about it!

How the hell did that happen???